A joyful dance!

Today was joyful on more than one level.

On of our last combinations in ballet today was to "We're Off to see the Wizard" from, you got it, the ever popular "Wizard of Oz." It certainly did get us to skip our jetes. So much fun! I can't even begin to explain.

Then, I was off to see my own personal wizard, my plastic surgeon who has certainly done a wonderful job of creating something from nothing for me on many occassions. My tattoos were deemed gorgeous and lifelike. Even better, I was semi-discharged. My next appointment, unless something comes up in the meantime (more on that in a sec) is 2 years. 2010!!! Will I even remember to schedule an appointment? I only have to see him every two years.

Well, that's every two years providing I don't need revisions of any sort. We went with a lighter, pinker than average color for my tats. So, it's more likely to fade and need touch ups. Right now, that would be OK with me. There are actually a few shirts I have to wear a bra with now because you can see through them a little. Oh well. :P

Then, there's the revisions bit. As much as I hate to say it, as it stands now, I really could use a little more surgery. There's a little bit of extra tissue/skin on the sides that just doesn't go with my new girls. It did work with the old ones, but they tried to kill me, so I don't care for any reminders. This revision surgery is not going to happen, if at all, until I lose the weight. I know, I know. Some friends will say I'm just fine the way I am... and I thank you for that... you are good friends. :) I may even decide once the weight it off that I still don't want the surgery. If it's going to involve liposuction, I might just pass on the whole thing. Lipo is no fun to recover from. We'll see when the time comes. I've got 22 lbs to go.

That's right. I succeeded in my first month's goal. More joy! 2 lbs down. Hoping to pick up the pace a little in February as I'm hoping to kick my metabolism into gear with all this exercise I've been doing lately.

Onto February!

ETA:

Almost forgot.

I have another scrapbook page to share.

This is from Scribble Scrabble's Felicity line. This line actually has some pretty flowered paper. For some reason, I just keep using the louder stars and circles.

That big felt star and the little felt star are from the "Tis the Season" felt shapes from FancyPants. It's a Christmas themed product, but I keep finding other uses for almost everything in it. Can't wait to get the rest of the Nutcracker images so I can do a few more pages with the more Christmasy elements.

It's that time of year again.....

For my non-scrapbooking readers, which may very well be the majority as I'm not really sure who if anyone aside from a few friends reads my blog anymore, we are in the final days leading up to CHA. CHA is the Craft and Hobby Association's twice a year trade show. What does that have to do with a part-time physician, full time mom, and returning adult ballet student? LOL. My other hobby is designing scrapbook pages and various paper crafts and I d0 this for two manufacturers. I won't actually be attending the show in Anaheim (wish I was!) but some of my work will be there.

So.. that means I've actually been creating a little again. :) Some of which I can actually share. Others are for the trade show or publications and need to wait a little longer.

This one is Rachel and her friend, Elise. They are convinced they are best friends for life. They actually only see each other twice a week at ballet as Elise is taking classes in another level. On the off days, they stay in touch just like tweens and teens everywhere with IM and emails. The papers and die cuts are all from Scribble Scrabble's new Felicity line.

This is my niece, Hannah, photographed in Rachel's arms, when Miss Hannah was just a few hours old. I love these papers from Scribble Scrabble's new Circus Baby collection. I've been scrapping non-baby layouts with them too.

I have to give a plug for this book which is now available on Amazon. I was honored to be a contributor. It is an amazing collection of art journals and the stories behind them. It's also filled with journalling worksheets and prompts. Definitely the most meaningful thing I've been involved with in the papercrafting world. I admit that I initially had mixed feelings about sharing something like my cancer art journal with the world as there are some pretty raw feelings expressed in those pages. When Rachel saw my pages in the book, she was surprised because it was a project she had never seen. She's my usual audience and number one critic. But she didn't get to see this, just like she doesn't get to read my journal. She does read my blog whenever she can (hi Rach) though. :) I am so glad I participated in this book and I am honored to be included with the other strong and creative women featured in it's pages.

Twirly Girl

That's me.

I took two ballet classes this week. Back to back, in fact. One yesterday and one today. I am totally addicted to ballet again, just like when I was 12.

I actually need to order more dancewear. For me! Not Rachel. What a strange concept.

I feel like I found a piece of myself that was missing.


And, on that long road out of Cancerville, I am happy to report that the *%#&*)^& toenail has been declared by my podiatrist to officially be improving! My next check up is in 3 months at which time I hope to be discharged from his care. Of course, that will mean that I have room in my schedule to see other specialists, like the gastroenterologist and the cardiologist my internist has asked me to see. But, we'll cross that bridge later. For now, I'm just a 5 doc girl. A twirly girl at that. :P

I DID IT!!!

I feel like jumping up and down! (where's Vern when you need her anyway :P)

I DID IT!!

I went back to ballet class for the first time in 20 years. Probably 25 years since I took class on a more than once a week basis.

It was like coming home.

OK, So it was like coming home but the lights are off and someone rearranged all the furniture! LOL!

I took a 90 minute advanced adult ballet class. I think if I could have taken an adult beginner class (they don't have one at this studio), it would have helped because I wouldn't have been quite as lost. Everything moved much faster than I remembered!! But when I was able to remember what I was supposed to be doing, I could do it! That probably doesn't make much sense, but it works for me. :P I was able to get through most of the barre exercises (and I've been told this particular teacher's barre is a tough one) but floundered on the floor exercises quite a bit. I think there was only one combination that I was able to master. For the rest, I just tried to get bits and pieces of them.

Afterwards, the instructor did pay me a few nice compliments... including saying that it was clear that I had been very well trained. (That might be true but it was once upon a time... LOL). I remember the days when I could walk into any dance class anywhere and pretty much keep up, so it was a little frustrating for me and I imagine it will be until I get back in the groove. Yup. I am going back again.

For the last 20 years, I've tried different forms of exercise but haven't stuck with anything. Quite frankly, I don't enjoy running. Walking is OK, but I get bored even listening to music while I walk or even while watching TV (the latter helps more). I've tried aerobic dancing and plain old aerobics. I've even tried yoga, which I enjoyed and still do, but it's not like this. I think I've been looking far too long for something that was always around the corner. Well.. not quite around the corner, but close enough. If I have any regrets in this life, it's that I stopped taking dance classes. I can say that now that I've tried it again. :) I'm already thinking ahead and wondering if I can fit in 2 classes a week.... of course... that's today. I probably won't feel that way after I wake up tomorrow and after we sit on the plane to Florida for 2+ hours!!

tombe, pas de bouree, pirrouette... and again. :)

Resolutions and leotards

I usually resolve not to have any resolutions, but not this year.

You've already read my first one- surgery free in 2008!

I'm also aiming for no new diagnoses for 2008 as well. I think my personal list of medical problems is more than long enough for someone in their early 40's.

I'm going public with this next one in hopes that I'll stick with it. If I can keep the above two goals in control, this will be more likely. I plan to lose 25 lbs in 2008. There. I said it. Or wrote it. Either way, it's out there now. Mind you, my internist was impressed that I managed not to gain weight on tamoxifen. Not entirely true because I've gained small amounts and then lost them. We're talking 2-3 pounds, up and down. I finally broke through and actually broke through that plateau. So, now I'm going the rest of the way. Still, despite tamoxifen, I am going to lose weight this year.

Just yesterday, I purchased what just might become my little insurance policy for that weight loss. I admit, the morning after the bilateral mastectomy, I suddenly became aware of my belly. After all, I could see it for the first time in decades. :P LOL. Yesterday brought about another of those revelations. There is little out there that is more motivating to lose weight than trying on a leotard and tights! Yes, I bought a leotard and tights for me. Not Rachel. For me. For the first time in 20 years, I am going back to dance class. Ballet specifically. So, I bought ballet slippers too. :)

I admit I am nervous! Almost in the same way I was nervous about getting my port installed. But that wasn't so bad so I'm hoping this won't be so bad either. When I mentioned it to my dad, he went on and on about how good I was, back in the day. I reminded him that 2 decades have passed. Didn't mention the extra 25 lbs that I carry either. It's funny, because back in those days, I wouldn't have been nervous about walking into any dance class. I could have taken almost any dance class and kept up. But that was then and this is now. I don't remember the names of steps anymore and my body doesn't exactly remember how to do them. I'm worrying over perfectly silly things like remember the steps for combinations, things I used to pick up the first time through.

No more excuses. I've been finding excuses for most of the last year. Too many surgeries to recover from. Too much weight to lose first. Not enough stamina. But, then someone pointed out that there will always be something. She was right. If I keep waiting for the perfect time to go back, I'll never go back. So, I'm going. At least I'm going to try it. Wish me luck!