It's a whole new world

I logged into blogger and remembered that I actually had set up an account once upon a time. I suspect maybe it's time to try my hand at actually using it.

In April, I went for a routine annual mammogram. Got a letter in the mail 3 days later asking me to come back for repeat films. No big deal. EVERYONE gets called back at one time or another. It's just my turn. That weekend is Easter and radiology was closed that Friday. I call on Monday and I'm given an appointment for the next day. Hmm.. my suspicions are up a tiny bit, but still not panicking.

I walk into the mammo room and see my screening films on the light box. The tech mentions that there was something but they only saw it in the one view, so they are not sure if there is something there or not. I see the tiny little faint speck and I believe her. :) She takes tighter and tighter compression films for a total of 8 films. When she came back to take another film, she had put one of the more recent ones up. I could see immediately that it did not have the features I was looking for. It wasn't smooth. It wasn't round or oval. It was a little spiculated. It wasn't good. I knew it had to come out. The tech was more than a little surprised and asked if I worked there. LOL! I explained that I'm a physician. She said "But it's not written here. They normally write it on top if the patient is a doctor." I explained that no one had asked me. LOL! As if! :p

Next came the sonogram. First, with the tech and then with a radiologist. I outright asked if she thought it wa malignant. Her response was "Well, it is suspicious." That's all she said. I had no question in my mind at that point. I knew I had breast cancer. Plain and simple. The possibility that had haunted my childhood and many of my adult years was now a reality.

I pulled on my sunglasses as I walked out of the office. I knew the tears were coming. They held off until I walked out the door into the sunshine. I climbed into the car and called Howie. He was out. Had to leave a message in between my sobs. I decided to finish my errands. I went to get gas, never taking those sunglasses off. While at the gas station, I actually called my insurance company to see if the surgeon I wanted was in my plan. The idiot on the phone told me she wasn't. Fortunately, when I went home and called her office myself, they let me know they did indeed participate with my insurance company. Halleluyah!