A Tale for Tuesday

So, I am having a quiet day at home, finishing up a few projects, when the phone rings.

As I often do, I look at the caller ID before answering.

I see it is my internist's office calling. Odd as I don't have an appointment until September, but perhaps there's been a schedule change.

I answer and hear "Dr. Ackerman? We're calling because your insurance company notified us you did not have a colonoscopy this year."

Interesting.

Knowing that I am not quite the age for a routine colonoscopy but also knowing that my internist has been encouraging me to have one anyway (a result of my ever so wonderful family history and the fact that there are certain cancers that breast cancer survivors have a higher than average risk of developing.. not exactly fair, huh?), I begin to question the gal on the other end of the phone.

Before I get too far she says "Oh did I say colonoscopy? I meant mammogram. Your insurance company notified us that you have not had one this year and we are just reminding you."

Oh really? You are reminding ME to have a mammogram?

Can you see where this is going?

Without the slightest hint of sarcasm, anger or even humor, and without even thinking, I quickly respond "I haven't had a mammogram because I don't have breasts." (Silicone implants, pectoral muscles and skin are not actually breasts).

I think everyone in a 5 mile radius heard her gasp.

I matter of factly continue, "It's been almost 3 years since I had my bilateral mastectomy so I haven't had a mammogram since then."

Poor thing on the other end was babbling her apologies... and I kept talking! I did recommend they remind the insurance company so they don't count me on the lists of those not compliant with these sorts of things (it's one of the ways they rate doctors.. what percentage of your patients have had the routine screening tests they should have). The gal on the other end was still busy apologizing.

Must admit I had a good giggle when I got off the phone.

Maybe I should have just made an appointment just to see what would happen. :P

When it's time to change...

After 3 years, I finally decided to update my profile photo.

What you've seen on every previous visit to my blog was a photo taken in 2006, not long before I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Not that it was perfectly straight hair, but it was ever so much straighter than it is today. I've held on to that photo for far too long. It was understandable when I had no hair and even understandable as it grew back. I've gone from tight post-chemo curls to looser, more moderate curls and that's just where it is staying. That previous profile photo has not looked like me for a very long time.

(And of course, if you are reading this from Facebook.. you have no idea what I'm talking about because I've actually kept those photos slightly more up to date.)